The title to this post is a comment someone made to me on social media. There was a post on one of the many author groups I’m a part of that asked how any of us decided to go down the path of writing. I answered with a shortened version of the entire reason, and someone commented with that. It was heartwarming, and I figured I better make it into a blog post. Maybe it’ll help motivate someone else. It doesn’t even have to be for writing, just to motivate you for whatever path you are trying to go down! So let’s take a deeper look into my motivation or inspiration to write.
Was there someone who inspired me to write? Yes, and it wasn’t just one person. There was the author of my favorite book (which we will get to in a minute), there was my 7th grade teacher, and there were the many English/Creative Writing/any sort of writing class teachers that told me I had a gift and should pursue it. So yes, many people who inspired or told me I really couldn’t let this talent go to waste.
When did I first try to write seriously? I had to have been around 14 years old. I was given the opportunity to publish a mystery trilogy. We got far in the process too, but both sides sort of bailed out. The main reason, for me anyway, was simply I wasn’t sure if I wanted to be tied down to any sort of contract at such a young age. I mean, I could decide I didn’t like writing anymore the very next day. That’s just how teenagers work, right? Well, that never ended up happening, but I’m also not regretting that I backed out of it at the time. The stress, the commitment, many things could have turned me into disliking writing. It was worth it to not jump into what seemed like a dream coming true. Instead, I went ahead and just continued writing for my own pleasure.
So where does this all begin? It starts way back in seventh grade. I get introduced to what is going to become my all-time favorite book. When it was first brought up in my English class, I had never even heard of it. I wasn’t expecting anything more than reading the book and doing my assignments. Well, it ended up changing my life forever. It was The Outsiders by S.E. Hinton. I can’t even explain to you why it became a big part of my life. It just did. It hit me more than any other books I had read (and I was a BIG reader) in a way where I wanted to tell stories. I wanted to write a book, my own book. I had no idea where to begin though. Then there was something I came upon that helped lead me in a direction. I was at the age where I was getting on the internet more and I was meeting people who had similar interests as me. I ended up on this fanfiction website where other people were writing their own versions of The Outsiders, their own prequels, their own sequels, or just different sides of the story all together. Obviously this website had stories for all sorts of books, movies, games, comics, etc. I was only interested in reading ones for The Outsiders, and then eventually writing some. So, I joined up and decided to give the writing side of it a try. I got into it fast. I wrote A LOT. I wrote different types of stories, different genres, just everything. I will say I got pretty good at it too. Readers really got into my stories. Sure, it was just other big fans of The Outsiders, but it was fans who enjoyed my writing style and my storytelling. That’s basically where it all began, and I still write fanfiction from time to time. It helps keep the creative juices flowing when I need to refresh my brain from my own stories.
What gave me the struggles to write my stories? In my previous post, I talked about characters who had been in my head since the beginning of my writing journey. Specifically Tehgo, Mitch, his brothers, and Steve. All these years I have tried writing many different plots and ideas for them. For real though. I wrote A LOT of different stories for these characters. Nothing stuck though. Nothing seemed right. It did bring me down many, many times. As much as I wanted to write these stories, I couldn’t do it in a way that I felt satisfied with. I’d try, then I’d stop trying, but then it would bug me enough to try again, and then I’d stop again. I was certainly giving up too easily and thinking this wasn’t meant for me after all.
What put it all to an official halt? Fast forward to when I settled down my life to becoming a mom and a wife. I had other things to focus on in my life where even writing fanfiction for fun wasn’t on my agenda. I was working jobs, being a mom, and trying to be a wife. I spend 2014-2018 having babies and completing our family. Writing would peek in my head from time to time, but I always pushed it away, not having time or the energy for it. I was definitely having my own personal battle on how writing was supposed to be in my life, if at all. I guess it seemed easier to say writing wasn’t meant to be in my life. I could just move on from it and try something else. I almost even tried convincing myself that I was just meant to be a mom. A mom is my calling, nothing more to focus on. It was easy to say that, but it wasn’t easy to accept it. Writing kept finding a way back to bug me.
What finally brought it back? Our youngest child got into that toddler stage, and I was finally hit with that question, “What am I going to be doing with my life?” I hadn’t gotten a chance to be hit with this question, because of how much attention being a mom took. It was only going to be a matter of time before my kids were at an age of not needing my attention 24/7. Even if I only have a career that was just meant to make money for the family, I wanted to at least have a passionate hobby for myself. Something that I did for my own pleasure and out of passion. I tried thinking of everything! Again, writing was still coming into my head. I was purposefully pushing it away though. I was convincing myself that it wasn’t in the cards for me.
It bothered me enough to start putting more time into fanfiction. I mean, that’s where I felt the most drive before, so go back to that. I figured if I at least wrote some fantasy stories for other fans to read, I’d feel like I was doing enough writing to suit me. In 2019 I went back to writing fanfiction, a lot. I was posting multiple stories at a time and writing chapter after chapter. I was going along the path of using it as a hobby, so I could at least say I was doing something for myself. It was me doing something absolutely not associated with being a wife or a mom. Almost a year passes, and I just wasn’t feeling that satisfaction I thought I would. I had a lot of readers telling me amazing things about the writing, and I couldn’t ignore it. In fact, I couldn’t ignore any of the battle in my head anymore. Writing was clearly meant to be in my future, no matter how much I wanted to argue it. How far would it go in my life? I had no idea. I still have no idea. All I figured out was writing is what’s meant to be mine, for me, something I do for myself.
How does it feel to read it motivated someone? Reading that comment was absolutely incredible. I didn’t think my short-version-answer could actually drive someone. My short answer was that I couldn’t ignore what my heart was telling me anymore. It took years, but I finally listened and went for it. It took a lot of discipline and a lot of self-encouragement to get it done, but I finally published my first book. I feel independence, I feel worth, I feel an actual calling for myself. Now, all the work I’m putting into it can get crazy, but I absolutely love it. The passion I have for it is what drives me to keep piling more on my plate and putting attention to it.
I really hope anyone that reads this can leave with a couple things…
- It may take days, weeks, months, years to really get somewhere with your passion or whatever it is you really want to do with your life, but take all the time you need! There is no time limit to do your calling in life. I know that my first book and future books are only going to be at their best, because they were meant to be written now. Not a few years ago or maybe ten years ago…they were meant to be written now, because by some fate now was when the stories needed to be told. Maybe it’s because someone is going to come along, read one of my books, and be touched by it. I don’t know why, but now was the time for it to happen. So if you seem stuck in some way, keep pushing it!
- If you feel yourself questioning if what you’re working towards is what you’re really meant to do in life. That’s fine! Just don’t throw it out right away! Take a step back, take a break, clear your head. Try other things maybe, but make sure you revisit to get your for sure answer.
Well, that’s all I got for this wonderful comment someone said to me. Please go check out my books page if you’d like to order a paperback copy of Pending Return.
Other news: Pending Return has now been added to Kindle Unlimited! If you have Kindle Unlimited, you get to read pages of the book for FREE before deciding to buy it. Go check it out! Just click on the link below.
Feel free to comment or message me if you’d like me to write a blog post on a certain topic or answer any questions you have in my next post. Don’t forget that subscribe button! Until next time my wonderful readers and fellow writers!